Basketball aka: Timesucker

 Basketball season (for Gracie) begins this Friday.  Basketball reminds me of that machine on the Princess Bride movie.  The one that causes an extreme amount of pain and then the nice six fingered man says, "I've just sucked one year of your life away". 

I am so happy that Gracie has something that she feels passionate about. I really enjoy watching her play.  But, for reals, could we have any more time suckers?? We just have four.  I love them, more than free time, obviously!  Let the time sucking begin!! 

We are getting SO old

 Gracie had a boys and girls party on Halloween.  I can not believe she is old enough for this!!  (that makes us old too)  She and her friends were nerds and their interpretation of nerds was pretty funny.  She has some great girls for friends.  I am so proud of her choices, so far.  She is an old soul with maturity that I never had at that age, or in high school, or in college.  As an adult I am as mature as my 13 year old.  This truth is just hitting me and it is mildly depressing.  Maturity is over rated anyway.

 We also attended our local Trunk or Treat and enjoyed Brody's version of a caucasian ninja. His face says it all, the cocky denial of danger and impertinent wink, it screams utter confidence.  He doesn't even need a costume for that.  His feelings of self worth are rock solid.  He was born that way.  

Avery was a lovely Apple White from the Everafter High series by Shannon Hale.  They are cute books, but the costumes were slightly hookerish.  We had to forgo the fishnet tights this getup came with.  She loved every minute of it.  This outfit has graced her little person no less than once a day since.

 This picture of Benjamin is from his therapy group/preschool party the day before.  He wanted NOTHING to do with his costume on Halloween!  Sensory issues at their finest.  He did tolerate it for the walk to exactly five cars to get candy and then was very kind to let me know, in no uncertain terms, that he was DONE.  He camped in the back of my friend's van for the remainder of the time.  He was content with a couple of suckers.  I love three year olds.

It was an awesome pagan holiday.

Love isn't for wimps

Our neighbor just died from terminal cancer, leaving her husband behind.  I went up and hugged him and he asked "what will I do?".  I have heard my own widowed mother ask this very question.  I also listen to friends and sisters worries and frustrations about their own spouse relationships.  If I ever doubt how I ended up with Rob, I only need to look at this picture of us.  We were the ripe old age of seventeen in this one. (above, obviously not below;)  We are practically glowing with love/infatuation/obsession, you name it.  I have concerns and worries about our relationship sometimes.  Sometimes I feel like throwing in the towel, and giving up, either by leaving physically or emotionally.  We are two drastically different human beings with different ideas and processes for life.  We agree on so much, but disagree on just enough to get under each other's skin sometimes.  We are, what I would describe, very happily married and it is still a challenge.  There is a lot of joy and a lot of frustration in this union of ours.  I love him fiercely and would never be able to really give up on us.  He feels the same, and so we plug on.  We have ups and downs, months of connecting to go with a week or two of distance, and still we choose to love each other.

 And in moments like the hug with my neighbor, and his awesome wife's funeral, I am thoroughly reminded of why it is worth it.  I am familiar with just a few of their struggles.  Some of them may have been a deal breaker for me, but they soldiered on, and raised four wonderful human beings together.  Their struggles make me thankful for my own and his sorrow makes me thankful for my joyful days.  

My neighbor and his late, totally cool, wife.

 Most of all I am really grateful for the perspective that other people's lives give me.  What a gift to have reminders that help me course correct and re prioritize what truly matters.  I wouldn't want to struggle, worry about, or argue with any other man.  I feel infinitely more love for him than I did in that first picture.  He is my person.  He is my best friend.  And I know that, when he or I go and leave the other behind for a time, we will be asking through our tears "what will I do?". 

My cutie patootie parents, before my Dad passed away.